This week's featured post: Am I raising atheist children?

In my continued effort to blog weekly on a story that caught my eye over at our sister site http://www.atheistspot.com/, this week I'd like to discuss a story posted by "budah" titled "Am I raising atheist children?"

The article is written by Nica Lalli, an atheist and a parent. She writes about how her own beliefs may be indirectly influencing her children to end up atheists, and how she strives give her kids the chance to decide for themselves. What strikes me most about this story is how it is a microcosm for the difference between atheism and religion. What is a religious parent's worst fear? That their child will grow up atheist. What is an atheist parent's worst fear? That they will unconsciously limit their child's chance to think for themselves.

I may be raising my kids outside organized religion, but I am not raising them to be ignorant of religion any more than I am raising them to be atheists. I am not telling them that they have to follow my way of thinking, because as a parent, it's my job to encourage them to think for themselves. I know that many religious parents do the same for their kids, and I know that good parenting has no religious affiliation. But how can a parent foster an open and questioning mind in a child who is also told to follow a god — without question?

Religion purports that faith is something to be admired, that belief without evidence is to be respected, and that doubt is to be repressed. The less evidence for something, the more faith you need, the better. Atheism on the other hand encourages doubt, skepticism, and holding things up to the light of reason. Don't rely on a stone age book's version of reality. Figure things out for yourself, ask questions, encourage your natural thinking abilities.

We struggle together to understand what it all means. I teach them about all the major religions, and when I am not sure, I call friends who are part of the religions in question for better answers. We look at the art made to honor deities, we read stories written to explain belief systems, and we talk about similarities and differences among religions, both extinct and still in existence today. I try to keep all the possibilities open to them, and I answer all their questions honestly. I admit that I do not believe in the many gods that are out there, but I respect people who choose to follow them.

There's no question that every parent will be disappointed if their children grow up to believe in way of life different from their own, no matter if they are atheist, christian, or muslim. The difference is that non-religious parents will teach their children to think through their decisions, consider the available options, and come to a well thought out decision. Atheist parents are often times still very supportive of their children even if they end up in a faith that they don't personally agree with. Contrast this with a religious parent that would have to believe that their children will suffer eternal damnation for eternity. How can they ever be OK with that? Or even worse in Islam, converting to any other religion is punishable by death.

I'll end with a final quote from a god-less parent who in previous centuries would be considered unfit to ever having children:

Part of being a good parent is allowing our children to become whatever and whoever they become. Watching my children explore the ideas that are out there and grapple with the many, often conflicting, religious views in the world is exciting. They bring new understanding to things — not only for themselves, but for me as well. If my daughter came to me and told me she was joining a church, I would ask her how she reached her decision. But that would be my approach with any of the big decisions in my children's lives. Questioning puts us all on a path to greater understanding.

Atheist Blogroll added

You'll notice on the right side a scrolling list of atheist blogs. This is organized by the Atheist Blogroll blog.

Actual quotes from the Koran. I'm scared for the future of the world.

Though most Muslim's don't follow these things literally, how can we deny that a religion with these passages in it's most holy book, that over a billion people read daily, isn't a scary and dangerous state of affairs?

Fighting is obligatory for you, much as you dislike it. - 2:216

If you should die or be killed in the cause of Allah, His mercy and forgiveness would surely be better than all they riches they amass. If you should die or be killed, before Him you shall all be gathered. - 3:157-8

Let those fight in the cause of God who sell the life of this world for the hereafter. To him who fights in the cause of God, whether he is slain or victorious, soon we shall give him a great reward. - Surah 4:74

O believers, take not Jews and Christians as friends; they are friends of each other. Those of you who make them his friends is one of them. God does not guide an unjust people. - 5:54

Allah will humble the unbelievers. Allah and His apostle are free from obligations to idol-worshipers. Proclaim a woeful punishment to the unbelievers. - 9:2-3

When the sacred months are over, slay the idolaters wherever you find them. Arrest them, besiege them, and lie in ambush everywhere for them. - 9:5

Whether unarmed or well-equipped, march on and fight for the cause of Allah, with your wealth and your persons. - 9:41

Fight those who believe neither in God nor the Last Day, nor what has been forbidden by God and his messenger, nor acknowledge the religion of Truth, even if they are People of the Book, until they pay the tribute and have been humbled. - 9:29 (another source: ) The unbelievers are impure and their abode is hell. (another source: ) Humiliate the non-Muslims to such an extent that they surrender and pay tribute.

O Prophet! Make war on the unbelievers and the hypocrites. Be harsh with them. Their ultimate abode is hell, a hapless journey's end. - 9:73

Unbelievers are enemies of Allah and they will roast in hell. - 41:14

When you meet the unbelievers, smite their necks, then when you have made wide slaughter among them, tie fast the bonds, then set them free, either by grace or ransom, until the war lays down its burdens. - 47:4

Muslims are harsh against the unbelievers, merciful to one another. - 48:25

Prophet! Make war on the unbelievers and the hypocrites and deal sternly with them. Hell shall be their home, evil their fate. - 66:9

As for the man who steals and the woman who steals, cut off their hands as punishment for what they have earned, an exemplary punishment from Allah. - Surah 5:38

Seems like all the "peace" is saved for other Muslim's, where war and hellfire is served to everyone else. Who say's religion isn't dangerous?

(source)

Imagine a country where church and state are one

Each of the following would be legally punishable by stoning (based on various religions):

• Working on Saturday
• Having an affair
  
• Getting an abortion
• Rejecting an arranged marriage
• Disobeying your husband
• Converting to another faith
• Sex before marriage
• Shaving your beard
  
• Being gay
  

New rules we would have to follow:

• Prayer mandatory in schools
• Sacrifice an animal regularly
• Slavery is A-OK
• Study your holy book weekly
• Cannot trust yourself to know what is right or wrong, you must consult with clergy
• Theft could mean the loss of a limb
• No stem cell research whatsoever

Simply compare the countries today that are the most religions and the least religious, in how they separate church and state, and the overall health of that country. If that doesn't tell us whether separation is a good or bad thing, nothing will. According to a study from Pitzer collage, the following countries are the least religious:

1. Sweden (up to 85% non-believer, atheist, agnostic)
2. Vietnam
3. Denmark
4. Norway
5. Japan
6. Czech Republic
7. Finland
8. France
9. South Korea
10. Estonia (up to 49% non-believer, atheist, agnostic)

The survey concluded that "high levels of organic atheism are strongly correlated with high levels of societal health, such as low homicide rates, low poverty rates, low infant mortality rates, and low illiteracy rates, as well as high levels of educational attainment, per capita income, and gender equality. Most nations characterized by high degrees of individual and societal security have the highest rates of organic atheism, and conversely, nations characterized by low degrees of individual and societal security have the lowest rates of organic atheism. In some societies, particularly Europe, atheism is growing. However, throughout much of the world -- particularly nations with high birth rates -- atheism is barely discernable."

What more do we need to know?

This week's featured post: When Leaving Jesus Means Losing Your Family

My goal is to blog weekly on a story that stands out and deservers special attention from our site http://www.atheistspot.com/. This weeks story was submitted by a user named "jewsforjesus", titled "When Leaving Jesus Means Losing Your Family."

In most of the world, including the US, it is often not a simple matter to come out as an atheist. Those of us that come from like-minded families or "free" societies take it for granted that we can decide for ourselves what we choose to believe. If I truly wanted to convert to Mormonism, my family would think I had lost it, but they would accept it and keep on loving me just the same. This simple fact is far from true for far too much of the world, including a huge part of the US.

"Not everyone is so lucky. Some families cannot get past revulsion and sense of betrayal they feel toward a member who has literally broken faith. Manifest examples of kindness, integrity, warmth, or generosity get reinterpreted. They were never real -- or the person has changed utterly."

This week's post illustrates how hard it is for "normal" american families to deal with a son coming out as an atheist, and the cost that is almost always overlooked to the persons coming out, such as their psychological well-being. In most of these cases, the family/friends feel as if god is punishing them. They hope by praying, guilt, shame, and often times violence, they can "save" their kid and bring him back into the light. The son or daughter is completely outcast, left on their own.

Now add to loss and self-loathing a crush of rejection by people who have loved you "unconditionally": friends, cousins, siblings, parents, or even a spouse.

And people say that religion is harmless. Families turn against their own when someone realizes there is no magic man in the sky. It's as if they are a completely different person the moment they admit to being an atheist, and nothing they do or say will change that.

The superficial reason this is such an issue for families and communities is because it
brings shame on the family from the community around them and makes the parents look as if they failed. And obviously it's more important to bring honor to your tribe then to let love your kids.

The real reason, as with most drama in life, is that it all comes down to spreading our genes (shout out to Richard Dawkins!). Just like the similar situation of a son or daughter coming out as homosexual, this news brings with it a reduced chance in spreading the family's seed. Innate in all of us is the need to propagate our genes. Anything that hurts this chance (e.g. unhealthy spouse, lack of food, lack of sex) causes drama and depression. A son or daughter claiming they no longer share the faith of the family not only means he/she is going to be roasting marshmallows in hell, but on a deeper level it means their culture and family heritage has less chance to survive. With that, there is less chance for the community to survive. In addition, to the parents there is the fear that the son or daughter will have a much smaller chance of having a successful life (how can an atheist make it through life without murdering someone!) and as such their chance to spread the genes of their parents is diminished.

One last thought...it is really amazing how similar this situation is to coming out as being homosexual, as this article points out. Your coming out is followed by shock, denial, violence, attempts to convert back, etc. Even the coming out process is similar. One day you realize that your whole life was an illusion, brought on by society and the need to be normal. One day you realize what you've known all along. The truth. And there's no going back.

Public Beta is here!

Finally, after taking everyone's suggestions and big ideas from the alpha launch, we're ready to let The Atheist Spot loose on the world!

What we need now from all our visitors, other then all your suggestions and ideas for further improving the site (which are always very much appreciated :), is posts, posts, and more posts. Submit all the interesting stories you come across (that have to do with atheist type issues of course). Don't forget to vote up or down on stories other people post, and comment on stories. It'll really help drive the community, and start showing us how great this site can be.

We're really excited about being at this point, and can't wait to see what this site evolves into!

Check it out at http://www.atheistspot.com/

P.S. Happy Pi Day and Einstein's birthday!